Dad gone, Home change

Omg!! I have to wake up early in the morning tomolo cos tomolo I have to work in MITC!! Today, I went and meet the people, I thought the place will be in the MITC and it is air-conditioned. How I know, it is under the HOT sun!! Luckily it is only for 2 days, and for the RM200, I have to do that. Everything now I have to rely on myself and more independent. I know I couldn't longer rely on my family and it is impossible for me to do that now.
Recently I'm not in very well and I couldn't express all it out in my blog or google talk cos I was so scare my brother will see it and blame on me to not independent and understanding. Once I see his personal msg wrote: Dad gone, Home change. Yes, it disturb my mind. And I cried. My sister msg me: 有空就回家看看吧！I feel that I was blame by them tat I never care for this family. Who know once I go bek I will arrange my time for my mum, I will do the home stuff, and they are those who oways in home will never even help my mum and she even blame by my brother that forgot do this or forgot bring that. I feel so sad when I see all this. Sometimes, it is not I dun care for the family, but once I go bek, I feel so lost and sad when I see the condition now in my family. It was like a family without wing now, and for sure I hate that feeling.
I think I have to stop now cos my tears was non-stop falling down now. I hope I can be stronger and more independent and I keep telling myself I can do it!